"z"---> *..~ BLISS + UNHAPPYNESS ~..* <---"z"
*sigh*iss 2:38am...juss got in a lil arguement wit mah boo...but nao dat i think about it...iss mah fault...kuz if i wer in hiz shoez...i would b shitty too...im still pissed tho..kuz heez mad at meeh...so left an offline message tuh him on yahoo messanger...an believe meeh..it wuznt very nyce...*sigh*...i hav tha pasword tuh hiz sn...so i hav tha chance tuh take it bak...but mah femanine pryde wont let meeh...iss sooo e z ... all i gotta do iz delete tha message..but yet..evrytym mah mouse iz redy tuh clik an mah fingerz redy tuh type...i freez...an wai??...iss mah feminine pryde...*sigh*...meeh az a female hav tuh b strong...
most peepo think...women R softiez...they kant b strong...but shiet...fuck dat..not in mah catagory...i dont wanna b known lyk all dem otha gurlz dat ther talkin bout...so...meeh...az a female...gotta stik tuh wateva tha fuck i sed...whether i regret it or not...an sadly but truly...i kan sweet talk him tuh fergiv meeh n e way...well most peepo kall it 'SWEET TALK'...but i lyk tuh kall it 'GOLDEN TONGUE'... ...<==(well dass pink but imagine iss gold..lolz)...
but n e wayz...i would say wut i hav dun rong..but again...mah feminin pryde wont let meeh...let yew kno...dat IM rong...so..im not gonna say shit...im juss gonna leev yaw'll wonderin...not dat im tryin tuh b meen or nuthin... ...but i would rather not admit...besidez...hu would actually admit ther rong if they didnt hav tew or feel tha need to??....hmmm...yew tell meeh...
*sigh*...i feel tha need tuh cry... ...but yet...mah teerz kum out dry...an showz nuthin...so diss feelin makez meeh wonder...am i reely better off alone??...iz diss luv??...or iz diss lust??...*sigh*...between luv an lust...i kant seem tuh tell tha difference...i dont think n e 1 kan...4 ther both alyk in completely different wayz...*sigh*...kunfuzin huh??...i kno...makez no sense tuh meeh either...but hey...maybe sumday...in sum truly pathetik yet painful way...ill fugure it out...
but wait a min...heez hurt meeh once b4...so heez gotta b able tuh pay fer watevr he did...i meen..i dont lyk gamez...an i dont lyk revenge...but hey...he still hurt meeh...an once a heart iz broken...it will nvr heel completely...tha torn piecez will alwayz b ther...an tha piecez...will alwayz b left aroun...tuh bring bak tha painful heartache bak once again...tha memoriez in wich no person in hiz/her rightful mind would evr want tuh remember...which bringz meeh tuh anutha question...
wai iz it dat we kan alwayz remember an nvr ferget..tha painful memmoriez...but yet we alwayz seem tuh ferget tha happy onez??...iz it b kuz tha happy memmoriez reely werent happy??...maybe they wer juss an illuzion...makin us think they wer tha feelin uv 'happiness'...so maybe therz reely no such thing az happiness...or maybe iss juss meeh...maybe iss kuz i nvr reely felt tha tru bliss uv wut happiness iz...or maybe i hav...i juss dont kno it..or remember it...
wait...i got it...tha tru bliss...livz in yer dreemz...4 in yer dreemz...yew kan actually escape evrything...tha pain,tha heartache,tha torture,tha agony,etc;etc;...in yer dreemz...yew dont reely 'feel' tha pain...yet yew kan 'see' tha pain...not 'feel' but 'see'...much better than tha reel world...wich haz little or nothin tuh offer...
so i think ill go tuh sleep nao...
zzzZZZZzzzZZZZzzzzZZZZzzzzZZZZzzzzZZZZzzzzZZZZzzzz.... | 
...
